it's beginning to look alot like chrismukkah

well, i had to hunt them down, but i finally found christmas mini-eggs. along with my midterm that was supposed to be on thursday being postponed until the new year and my chocolate fix, today was a most excellent day.

the christmas lights are strung accross the balcony, and the wreath is hanging on the door. it IS beginning to look alot like chrismukkah. all i want for christmas besides my two front teeth is my very own seth cohen beneath the tree.

everybody's got something, they'll take your money...and never give up

remember the zit remedy? man, do i ever wish they had more than one hit. which leads me to wayne's world. i was watching it tonight, and i totally forgot that cassandra's band is called crucial taunt. if that's not the best band name ever, i don't know what is.

so i saw national treasure last night. actually not half bad for a nicholas cage movie, considering it had the obligatory beautiful lead actress makes out with gross nicholas cage moment. barf. that poor girl. you couldn't pay me enough money to make out with nicholas cage and his sloppy mouth. well, you at least couldn't pay me to enjoy it. remember when he married lisa-marie presley? good times.

some more good times on the drive home today. you know when someone's going like 1/2 a km faster than you on cruise control, and you see them coming up behind you for like half an hour, then it takes another ten minutes for them to pass you? yeah, this dude did that to me, and i was laughing the whole time he was driving next to me. how could i not laugh? dude was driving right beside me. i also was pondering what happens to all the wildlife that gets schmucked along the road. i see the smears....where do they go? who's sucky ass job is it to pick that stuff up? then i had a sing-along.

samedi is the new saturday

i spent tonight at home. what a loser, studying on a friday night. well, more like watching the 'what not to wear' marathon on tlc. god, do i love clinton kelley. even when he wears those crazy pink polka-dot shirts. oh clinton, you crazy fashion guru. little do we all know you're leading us astray. i have a feeling this show is all part of some bigger plan to turn americans into really bad dressers, then make the entire country one big reality tv show hosted by sporty spice. really, what has sporty spice done lately? nothing. that just proves she's getting ready for her big role as the host of the worlds' largest reality tv show. unfortunately, the show will not last long due to low ratings. i mean, everyone is busy being on the show, they don't have time to watch it.

so after i write the stupid saturday morning test, i'm heading out on the open road back home. i'm ready for birthday cake and relaxation. i might even get in some shopping if i play my cards right. if i play my cards even more strategically, i might end up married to some mexian guido by the end of the weekend that will make me guacamole and prance around my apartment in pink spandex booty shorts. kind of like mango, but with less chest hair. i'm feeling lucky.

so to all of you poor sods who read this...tell your friends. maybe i can up my viewership to three people by the end of the year.

off the hizzle, fo shizzle

so after les mis last night, i've decided that my life will now play out like a musical. i will henceforth argue in song, dance in the street, and fall in love instantly with a boy (as he will with me) and we shall sing together and be married. it could happen. i mean, liza minelli has been married before. granted david guest was a fat, old, gay man.

sweet. wide mouth mason just came on the radio. totally random, but sweet. anyways, this brings up another point. the 'hard-rock' station here in town is weird. or, as goldmember would say, veird. anyhoo - i was listening to the radio this morning, and who should come on but phil collins. and not just any phil colins, but that 'i can hear you calling' song. did i wake up in a world where suddenly that is classified as hard rock? ooh, i long for the days of when the world was normal....where the spice girls ruled and people though ricky martin was heterosexual.

oh. and for something fun, check this out.

culture club

so i'm officially on the way to adulthood. i paid for, and attended my first musical tonight parent-free. les miserables for the thrid time - and it was good. jean val jean was amazing. and as usual, i am in love with marius. my only complaint of the show shall come in the form of a letter:

Dear Mr. and Mrs. Blah-be-dee-blah.

Thank you for talking in normal voices to each other through the entire performance. It really made my night special. I'm so glad I paid $87 to sit by you. And yes, Mrs. Blah-be-dee-blah, when Javert climbed over the barricade he was looking for Jean Val Jean. How did you know? You must have seen the play before. I must say though, that next time i'm looking for a colour commentary through my second-favorite musical, i'll call Don Cherry.

Sincerely,
The girl that was staring at you and telling you to shhhhh.

weekend o' no work

it seems that i always get my inspiration to work at 9pm sunday night. then i get one hour of good work done...usually the most work i do all weekend. well, this weekend at least. but i have myself convinced that i deserved a weekend off. i also seem to have convinced myself that i needed a new sweater, purse and eyeshadow while at the mall for half an hour today. is it normal to spend that much money in so little time? maybe i should call the guinness book of world records. surely i've set some kind of amazing record...but i imagine that they'd send someone out here to watch me repeat my feat, and then they'd tell me that in fact i'm not the worlds best shopper, but have the worlds longest nose hairs. meh. i'd still be in the damn book.

i whipped out the tegan and sara cd whilst driving around today. i had forgotten how much i love the line, "i would go to jail with only boys, just to prove i was as tough as you". it's so good. too bad they would both rather go to jail with only girls. did i mention today that i love interpol? well, i do. thank you paul banks for giving me antics. if we ever meet, i'll take you on one of my amazing death-defying shopping trips. or show you my nosehairs. whichever you prefer.

random summary of events from the weekend:
i broke in my pointy shoes last night, and didn't fall on my face and die.
our waiter at supper looked like mark tewksbury.
the dollar store has toys called 'special can' and 'delicious fresh'. english must be their fourth language.
colin firth is sex on legs.
hugh grant is sex with a tan.
boys are officially shit.

i've got a lovely bunch of coconuts

so i have this theory that the only reason andy is still on the apprentice is because donald trump wants to dress him up in pink booty shorts and have him serve him pina coladas by the pool. i see the way he looks at him. he so wants to make andy his bitch. can't you picture the donald spanking him as he walks away, laughing like a school girl? maybe it's just me.

i was at the corner pharmacy today buying a treat for myself and my roommate when the clerk started talking to me. normally this idle conversation wouldn't be weird, but it was the same clerk that only one week ago looked at my boobs as he was passing me my bag. smooth, buddy. really smooth. so now he tries to talk to me about school.....he's actually kind of cute....but i looked like ass having come out of my lab exam wearing a bouffant for an hour and a half (thus having a line on my forehead) and all i wanted to do was go home. boys are so weird. you can look like shit and they'll talk to you, or you can hang out all summer with them and they won't email you. fuckers.

okay, so that's my rant. i plan on doing nothing but not thinking about boys for this whole next ten minutes. in fact, i'll think about something completely different....how about HB pencils.

you sit on a throne of lies

well it appears i lived through the dreaded therapeutics exam from hell. i'm sure glad that our profs emphasize important points, and then put the non-important ones on the exam. i love that. i bought elf for myself to compensate for my retardedness and bitterness towards mankind. not mankind the wrestler though. he's cool.

i was sitting thinking the other day about mullets. that's not totally out of the ordinary, as i often think about mullets. but that's besides the point. i was just wondering why people actually still have mullets? sure, there are the hipsters that are cutting their hair like that becaue it's so not cool it's cool to have a mullet. but i'm talking about the people that actually have mullets because they have since 1983. does the mullet act like some force-field in which the mullet-bashing can not penetrate? maybe that's why they all seem like no one got the 'cut your mullet off, loser' memo. but really, you have to know it's not cool. who are these people kidding.

the boys from matt mays and el torpedo rocked my world last night. i do love afternoons.

life's a bitch and so am i

so i'm sitting in class 'listening' to my medchem prof when in the middle of a sentence, he stops and makes this noise like he has a hairball caught in his throat. apparently i'm the only one who heard it...or the only immature enough person to laugh at it...but it was totally funny.

so it's friday. that means i must comment on the bajillion hours of tv i sat through last night. here we go.

#1 - the o.c - okay, now i'm pissed off. if this whole year is going to be about marissa and ryan and how they secretly love each other but are both too bitch-assed to do anything about it, i'm going to scream. and summer is a retard. seth totally loves her, and she's making out with some stupid boy on the swim team. okay, wait. let me rephrase that. making out with some boy on the swim team isn't so bad...but making out with seth would be better.

#2 - the apprentice - i so called it last week that chris would screw up and get fired. c'mon people, let's make 'reality tv' less predictable. i'm not even going to comment on this show, other than that everyone now must call me 'the amanda'. if the donald can do it, so can i.

#3 - er - a good enough show...but what happened to carter, carrie and all the old characters that are still on the show but never show up? stop showing me retarded interns. i don't care about them. and if i ever have to hear ray liotta make barfing noises again i'm going to shred my ears off with a cheese grater.

unexplained hatred of the day: rod stewart.

sigh.

it is now officially half way through thursday, and i don't know much more than i did yesterday. instead of whining about how screwed up my study habits are, let's talk about how i didn't see colin farrell naked last night.

it took some convincing, but we picked up a home at the end of the world last night. i'd give it an 'e' for effort. i couldn't help but laugh every time colin kissed a boy. not exactly realistic. although kudos to him for not being typecast into another macho manwhore role. i was dissapointed when the dvd left out the nekkid bits they cut for the theaters. i may be speaking for all of womankind when i say i would love to be distracted by colin farrell's man parts.

i love soup. i think that it's great. in fact, i'm going to have soup for lunch today. why do i love soup? it's easy to make. plus, it's an excuse to eat crackers. and crackers are also another thing i like.

i think lil' bow wow made a mistake by dropping the 'lil' part. what has he done since he became just plain bow wow? not much. he could be like prince and change his name back. i know i wouldn't hold it against him. speaking of music, i can't wait until the fugees put out a new album. let's just hope that lauryn hill's craziness doesn't rub off on wyclef and pras and they end up putting out some unplugged bullshit. that would suck almost as hard as garth brooks pretending to be chris gaines.

former favorite stroke: fab
new, improved favorite stroke: nikolai

.hella procrastination.

okay, so i haven't posted since halloween. wow, i sure suck at this game. perhaps it is the impending exam on tuesday that has me finally posting my second entry. but i shall continue to avoid studying...after all, it's only wednesday and i still have five days to study. minus the three hours of great tv tomorrow night. ps- i can't belive raj got fired last week. what was the donald thinking?

i'm sitting here listening to paul banks and the boys from interpol. i love hipster rock. i love that he says the subway is a porno. and i love carlos d.

back to tv. why do they put all the good stuff on thursdays? i almost have to set up three tv's in one room to watch all the shows i want to watch. huzzah for the o.c...it's been six months, but the teen angst is back in full force...how dawson's creek. too bad pacey and dawson never had the sexual tension of seth and ryan. i can see it now. marissa walks into the pool house to find them making out, then screams for five minutes and throws furniture into the pool. i think that the writers should somehow write marissa screaming and throwing things into a pool in every episode. they could switch it up by making it one of those turtle kiddie pools sometimes.

funny accent of the day: natasha from rocky and bullwinkle.

i'll blog more tomorrow.