the good ol' days

okay, so i am totally disappointed right now. it's been like 3 years since i've had a girl guide cookie. last night, i finally had one...and it was crap. not just regular crap, but as in 'crap' said with a scottish accent. they changed the people who make the cookies (well, i suppose not people, as in keebler elves to knomes, but rather companies), and now they taste like poo. granted, they're still cookies and i'll eat them - but they aren't the special treat they once were. ooh, i'll be telling my children this one day. that, and how back when i was a kid, we had cd players that played only one cd at a time. whooo, technology these days.

oh, and i saw the jack black look alike on the bus again today, and i couldn't stop looking and secretly giggling. the dude looks so much like him, i'm tempted to take my camera and take secret spy pictures of him so i can prove to the rest of the world that jack black's doppleganger takes my bus. i'll be world famous, and sell the pictures to tabloids - i'll get millions for risque pictures of jack black taking OCtranspo. don't worry, i'll invite you on my yacht.

and in other news, i have a husband that catches a bus at my stop now - i drove by him the other day, and wanted to hop off the bus and get married. then i saw him again today and realized how impossibly cute he really is. he has a tattoo on his arm that's totally hot, and he had marks on his legs from socks (which you could see cause he was in shorts) which were totally adorable. some boys should be cloned and sold in stores for all women to enjoy.

rock bottom

i'm going to a zombie movie. i have never actually seen a zombie movie, nor do i desire ever seeing a zombie movie. alas, i am going to one in 45 minutes. it's out of sheer boredom, and the fact that i've done nothing today. the opportunity presented itself, and yes, somehow i managed to convince myself that watching a zombie movie would be better than an evening of doing nothing. i may prove myself wrong.

hopefully i'll get eaten by a zombie during the previews and i won't have to suffer through the movie. then, when i inevitably become a zombie myself, i'll lurk in the theater and eat other poor girls like me who are seeing zombie movies against their will. then hollywood can make a movie out of my life, and call it 'the zombie who saved the world from bad dates' or something. that's just the working title. i imagine drew barrymore would play me....and that i'd steal fab from her in real life and we'd have millions of babies.

hodge podge

so it's going to be another blog of ramblings on - mostly because i'm too lazy to divide up the subject matter.

anyways, today was a long - but interesting - day. i spent the day shadowing our palliative care pharmacist at work, and i began to barely touch the tip of the iceberg as far as the role of a health care professional in palliative care is concerned. the day to day issues that these people face when providing end of life care are nothing short of amazing, and the stories that i observed were great life lessons.

my day in palliative was capped off appropriately with a seminar on dealing with death and dying, delivered by joan halifax, a buddhist anthropologist who has been working with the terminally ill for about 30 years. she shared some heart-wrenching stories of patients she has cared for, and provided some great advice for clinicians on how to approach caring for palliative patients. she stressed that the experience of being with a dying patient is an honour, and that love and death are two gifts in life that often go unwrapped. she also made an interesting statement about faith, saying, "people who are scared of hell are religious, and people who have lived through hell are spiritual." the more i think about it, the more i think i agree.

and on a lighter note, i was on the elevator this morning and noticed the elevator license, which was titled as an, "ontario elevating machine". hello!!! why do we call them elevators when we could be calling them 'elevating machines'? it is beyond me. it's kind of like washers and dryers. we say the occasional 'washing machine' and think nothing of it, but do we ever say 'drying machine'? nooooooo. well, from now on i do. oh, and will you hit 5th floor on the elevating machine for me? i'm going up.

unnnnnnngh

i saw the cutest little boy on the bus today. he had shaggy, dirty blonde hair and the biggest brown eyes i've ever seen. i wanted to run up and steal him, take him to the zoo, feed him ice cream then take him back home. is that weird? i think not.

aaaaaaaaaand, the hottest boy ever sat next to me on the bus today too, which was really fun. when he came in and sat down he gave me the cutest little smile, and i proceeded to grin sheepishly the entire time he sat next to me. did i mention i wanted to grab is ass? because i really did. he was definitely sexxxaaay. he had these shorts on...and the nicest legs.....okay, give me a minute here to get ahold of myself. whooo. *breathe in through the nose, out through the mouth* whooo. okay, i'm good.

other than cute boys on the bus, today was fairly uneventful. i bought a flat iron from a psycho hose-beast, so that was fun. oh, and i ate an entire bag of peanut butter m&m's, and now i think i need a gastric lavage, but hey, as alanis says, 'you live you learn'. then again, she also says 'slap me with a splintered ruler' and i want none of that.

and to cap off the randomness of my day and thoughts, i will flash back to grade 10 english class and romeo and juliet, where the boys in my class insisted on calling benvolio 'cornholio'. as if my blog wasn't strange enough up to this point.

bladder cats

okay, so not that i don't already hate cats enough, but i seem to have met my cat arch-rival. not even a joke, this cat is nuts and i fear for my life. i was literally sleeping with one eye open, waiting for it to gouge at my eyes with its sharp talons. and yes, the cat does have sharp talons. screw the chickens.

okay, so this all started about 22 hours ago when i get a booty-call (with no booty, might i add...only a booty-call because of the time frame) from summer crush. i had just returned home, and sent him an email seeing if he wanted to hang out the next night. two minutes after pushing send the phone rings - it's 12am, so i make a mad dash, and i hear his voice on the other end. long story short, i end up going to his place to watch movies. so after drinking a huge coffee to stay awake, i finally fall asleep on the couch at like 4:45. i've been peeing at 30 minute intervals up to this point due the coffee and water i've been pounding back, so it's no surprise that i wake up having to pee. this urgency to pee is only compounded by the fact that psycho-cat has just landed on my bladder and is walking in circles trying to get comfortable.

so i'm lying there with this cat on my extremely full bladder, trying not to move for fear that it will bite my face off. and that is not how i imagined leaving this world - the last thing i want is for people to say 'cat's ate her face' a la malcolm in the middle. so this cat is staring me down now, daring me to move. it's got this smug look on its face like it knows i have to pee and it knows i'm not going to do anything about it. so i'm lying there praying that this stupid thing will get the mind signals i'm sending it to move the heck off of me. this goes on for about ten minutes, until finally the cat jumps off because summer crush walked out into the living room. wearing nothing but his boxers, might i add. he was my night in shining boxers. but not shining, striped. anyways, i was so out of it from lack of sleep and the urge to pee that i dragged my arse off the couch, brushed my teeth and drove home at 6:30 in the morning. i would have stayed longer, but i was afraid to fall back asleep around that freaking cat.

adventures in bussing

okay, so i have been taking public transportation for just over a month now. at first, i loathed the bus. communal transport has never really been my bag - i mean, i enjoy my own climate controlled car, where the stinkiest person is me, and i can choose who i ride with. this being said, over the past few weeks i have come to discover that the bus is good for a couple of reasons - it's always on time, and it's kind of fun standing up while it's driving.

but there are still several things i loathe about the bus. when it's friggin' hot outside, i hate waiting for it. all the other busses emanate heat, and that blows on me when the drive by. i hate the bus after work, because everyone and their lawnmower is trying to take the bus home at the same time, which means i end up standing in the middle of the bus and shuffling around at each stop to let people off or squish more people on.

i must say though, the bus is a great place to people watch. there is mr. crazies, who comes on and sways back and forth talking to himself. there is geek-boy, who i swear must be getting shoved into his locker with a four-picker wedgie daily because of his geekiness. there is a jack black look alike (pre-weight loss) who always makes me laugh, because hey! he looks like jack black. and yesterday, there was this dude talking in some foreign language with a lisp. i thought that to be interesting.

i wonder sometimes what people think when they see me on the bus. any thoughts?

buggin' out

there is a bug on my computer screen. i dare not hit it while it's in the middle, cause it'll smudge and i'll be too lazy to wipe its guts off and therefore will be squinting through this bug-gut smear for like two days, until it eventually makes me angry enough to get a kleenex and wipe it up. argh. stupid little bugs that infest my house - and no doubt - lay eggs in my ears at night, feed on my brain and thus are responsible for my recent space-cadet-like behaviours.

i digress.

it was yet another freaking hot and humid day. these days, there is a stink in the air like all of ottawa is hot and in need of a shower. it's like every person outside is sweating out of every conceivable area on their body from which it is possible to sweat from. there are virtual pools on the sidewalk from sweat after a person stops moving for more than ten seconds. well, not really - but that's what it feels like. i'm sweating so much, and the only cure is more cowbell.

another thing: there was a supposed bomb threat at the american embassy here in town today - sussex drive was closed off for awhile, so i understand. we were pondering the situation at work, and we figured someone just walked in and said 'i am da bomb'. or maybe, 'this kentucky fried chicken is da bomb'. or maybe, 'this new jay-z song is da bomb'. or maybe '______ is da bomb'. i'm sure it was all a simple misunderstanding that can be chalked up to too much ghetto-speak. but, you know those americans...they love their ghetto.

i couldn't help but wonder...

so i have horribly misjudged my ability to show self-control. but what can i say. i'm a 22 year old girl, i should know better. "only one per paycheque" i assured myself. but i couldn't do it. i only have two remaining, and i know it's only a matter of time before i succumb to their call.

two seasons of sex and the city, that is. and technically, it's only one season - season six. i came accross an offer i couldn't refuse for 3 & 4, so now i've got 1 through 5. almost the whole set. and that last season is calling my name harder than the 'renegade comeback' with sweet potato fries at the works.

so lately my life has been an endless string of sex and the city episodes, broken up by random attempts at going out in the 40 degree weather. the humidity instantly hits you like a wall the second you step out of your nicely climate-controlled house. i managed to make it to the museum of civilization yesterday for a gander at the 'pompeii' exhibit being housed there. quite fascinating, really. then i foraged on to 'mr and mrs smith', which was definitely worth the 5 pounds i lost in sweat.

and today, i had the most exciting outing of all. it's summer crush's birthday soon, so i have been struggling trying to think of the perfect gift that both means something, and isn't too forward. i settled (after much deliberation over movies, music, etc) on a t-shirt. 'too personal' you may say. but i disagree. i had to fight my way through the nerds, but i think i found the perfect gift: a 'punisher' t-shirt. i know he likes the comic...and it'll be something totally unexpected. plus, it's something that he can use for a long time...and will hopefully remind him of me when he uses it. mwhaaaah. *evil grin*

and actually, the comic store was kind of fun. it was like those boys had never seen girls that up-close before. ooh, i love dorks.

gummie bears and spin

so, you'd think that in a city the size of ottawa, there would be 790,567 stores that sell spin magazine. so far, the only place i have found it has been this dingy newspaper stand right by the bus stop in the mall. of all freaking places. hey, i can't really complain, as it's right on my way home - but really, ottawa is friggin' huge (said like donald trump, so really 'uge') and should therefore have more than one place that sells spin.

where is this going you ponder? nowhere, really. but there is an article in the new spin on oasis which made me laugh. noel said twat, and as people may or may not know, i find that word hilarious. oasis are back with a vengance: everywhere i've looked the new record has been rated higher than the new coldplay. i must say, i picked it up, and it sounds good to me. but then again, liam gallagher could tape himself pooping and i'd most likely buy it.

i hate to admit it, but i've always had this weird attraction to those damn gallagher brothers. i think it's because they're bad. and they have accents. and they drink guiness. and because 'don't look back in anger' is one of my all-time favorite songs.

ps - i bought gummie bears tonight. it's so hot outside, gummie bears were a bad idea. oh, and it turns out i don't really like gummie bears. so if someone wants to adopt some, send a self-addressed stamped envelope to me and i'll mail them out.

blogosphere

okay, so i'm back to the world of blogging. it's been a whirlwhind month here in ottawa, with me starting a new job, housing a classmate and getting re-acquainted with the summer crush. all of which are going fairly well. i doubt i have any readership left after the hiatus, but hopefully it'll return. as projet orange says, 'tell all your friends'.

oh, and i'm going to keep this post short on account of i'm reading 'angels and demons' by dan brown right now and it's super-duper good. super-duper reminds me of sprinkle-dinkle which reminds me of milky way which reminds me that on amazing summer nights like it is here right now, i would rather be at that little ice cream shack on victoria ave than any other place in the world.

ps - i got hit on by an old man today. and not even inconspicuously. i asked him if he was waiting for the elevator, and he said 'no, i'm just watching you'. so i said, 'but i'm not that interesting'. and he said, 'oh, yes you are'. good thing he wasn't forward or anything. *shudder*

ps2- wait. now why can't i get the one boy in the universe i want to hear that from to say that? sheesh. get it together, buddy!